I found it particularly troubling that after a decade of making efforts in conversation to remind hardcore Bushies that the people of the middle east are human beings, and xenophobic stereotyping of them is not justification to kill them without regard, for my sins I had to watch a guy riding around on a Camel whacking people with a sword. I held up my end of the bargain Muhammed,, you dick-bag. Naturally the prices of fuel are speculated to rise in response. I'm so tired of guys on Camels with swords having anything to do with what it costs for me to drive to work.
"They are just riding around on camels with swords." -My dad, more than likely, at one point or another.
Austin Texas may have it's share of northern transplants but even with us, weather babies abound. A few rainy days, and mascara sweats down the cheeks of every BMW driver in town. Add some freezing weather to the mix and this former Pennsylvanian was set up for a laugh-riot.
I woke up Friday glad that something was on the tube besides Egyptians running each other over with delivery vans, which was a welcome change of pace from the totally not SPCA-friendly camel/horse cavalry charge. The intro music to "Austin Snow Day 2011" was more ominous than the set up for a murder investigation expose'. I watched some guy in a Mustang try to figure out how to drive up a slight incline covered in ice. Nothing like live coverage of your awkward moment. Then I hit the road.
The commute to work was AWESOME! I haven't driven in a good snow and ice situation since early 2009 if memory serves. I remembered today that in Pennsylvania most people are shittacular snow drivers, but after I saw Austin at it I laughed myself silly.
The highlights are probably driving to I35. When we got to the intersection to cross 35 There were about 5 cars sitting at the light with their back up lights on. Nothing was in front of them. The first person just chickened out to continue driving in the snow and started backing up. None of them tried to actually turn their car around and just drive the other way. They all just starting driving in reverse. It was unfathomable how they thought this was going to solve anything. I swerved past the douchebag in the Mustang (not the same guy as before, but one of a grab-bag of Austin Mustang douchebags) and continued to work. I was the only person on my team who showed up until about 3 other joined me between 10AM and 2PM. I did what I could to shoulder the team's work.
Ok, I also fucked off reading magazines and watching Egypt stand around yelling at one another. I have determined that although I enjoy The New Yorker in general, it's hard to forgive the fact that it's such a window into what it's like to be a blue-blood old-money yuppy. I really imagine that a day in the life of the NY'ers mainstream reader is spent riding in the back of a Lincoln Towncar waiting for your parents to die.
I read an article about google and it went into detail about an incident where a Viacom executive was speaking to one of the founders while he was nose-to-screen with his PDA and finally the Viacom man said something like, 'either read your pda or pay attention to me,' and the google guy said 'ok, I'll read this then.' I think that story does the same thing for wannabe dot com founders as Hustler Magazine's content does for lonely truckers.
At the end of the day I was offered to come in Saturday to work some hours to make up for lost time. I reminded my team leader that I was only 20 minutes late so I didn't really need to do that. She asked if I was late because of the snow. I said "No, I was here at 8, I just saw how empty the parking lot was and figured I'd swing over to StarBucks before I signed in." That was my little version of paying attention to my PDA instead of talking business.
I always love talking to other people's customers at work because they aren't in and we need to 'move the file forward.' They latch on to my lack of accent, pronounceable name, and actual ability to understand what they are saying and try to insist that I handle their claim. "I don't understand why you can't help me, I sent in all the information you'd need in my letter!" -- Yes maam, I understand but I didn't review all of that information. I'm calling to let you know Laquanda didn't make it to work today because of snow and she'll call you Monday. 'Why can't you help me?!' Because I have to call 8 more people and tell them why Laquanda hasn't called today. Move the file forward indeed.
